Many people think that distance is the main factor leading to the breakup of long-distance relationships, but in fact, many times long-distance relationships break up not because of distance, but because they lose the confidence to solve the problem of distance. Or to be more specific: they were defeated by a future that they still couldn't see clearly after being together for a long time.
When we were together, we were still full of confidence and hope. At that time, everyone felt that the problem of remoteness could be solved slowly in the future. What happened? ?
Three years after that, and three years after that, and three years after that, my parents urged me to go on a blind date - you see, what's the point of being in love for so long? The problem is still a problem.
At the beginning, everyone was aware of the problem, but no one solved it. The idea of ????"taking one step at a time, maybe there will be a solution in the future" has been until today, but in fact? In fact, it is not only this. Attitude prevents the problem from being solved in time, and even if we start now, we lose the time and method to solve the problem.
You said that you want to end the long distance in the future, but no one has tried to seriously think about how to live in the other person's city for such a long time; you said that you want to live together in the future, but until now, no one knows who Compromises and concessions should be made for the other half; you always feel that the problem can be solved one day in the future, but in fact you are both expecting the other person's mind to change... What did you solve?
If you don’t face the problem head-on, if you still can’t find a good way to solve the long-distance relationship after being in a relationship for many years, this situation will make you further lose your way. The confidence gradually drifted away until they finally parted ways.
And the more it is at this time, the easier it is for you to have communication problems. After a long time, not only the enthusiasm and motivation of the two people to meet have declined, but even the daily chats in the past have begun. It becomes intermittent. Under such circumstances, the other party will naturally feel: Forget it, this relationship can only go so far.
The breakup of a long-distance relationship follows a chain: the problem cannot be solved - confidence in the relationship begins to decline - loss of enthusiasm for the relationship - communication decreases - confidence in the relationship further declines - more detrimental to the problem Solve...
It is not because of distance that we are separated, but because of your attitudes when solving problems and the various misunderstandings that occurred during the process.
Therefore, if you want a long-distance relationship to last, you must start to solve the problem of long-distance relationships. Either two people work together to discuss the path and direction of their future life, or one party is determined to make compromises and concessions, or two people know from the beginning that this relationship only pursues the process and not the result.
The long-distance problem will not disappear naturally with the passage of time. Instead, it will become an increasingly important minefield in the relationship, and it will explode as soon as it is stepped on.
Is the distance in a long-distance relationship a problem? Objectively speaking, it is indeed a problem, but this problem is not the most important problem at all - you knew this problem existed when you were together, and you have been together for so long Time also takes a long time to deal with this problem, but in the end you still separated, and the distance is not to blame.
What you should reflect on is your own behavior: Have you led the other person to think seriously about how to solve the distance problem? In the process of solving this problem, have you been serious with the other person? Communication and exchange?
