Question:
I will be 30 years old in a few months, but I still have not been in love. This made my father very anxious. He was worried about my personal problems, but there was nothing I could do about it.
When I was 10 years old, my parents divorced. It was the mother who betrayed the father. At that time, my father was an honest and loyal man. He also works hard for the family. But her mother said that she and her father had been together for so many years and their life was not good, so she chose to divorce her father. Later, I heard that she married a rich man and was living a good life.
In this way, my father and I began to rely on each other. My father was very honest and honest. Although they continued to date each other later, they did not find his significant other in the end. Therefore, grandpa often scolded him and said he was a loser. At that time, I looked down on my father a little.
Although he never remarried, my father worked hard to raise me. The life was naturally very difficult, but later I developed a skill and was able to find a better job. I have been relatively introverted since I was a child, and I have always been busy after work. In addition, our factory is basically all male and there are very few people of the opposite sex, so we have always been single.
Over the years, I have also liked a few girls. But I hesitated for a moment and didn't confess, because I really couldn't get along well. I always remembered my mother's determination when she left, and I was afraid that I wouldn't be able to give her happiness.
I have been thinking about it. If I find a woman, if I don't get along well after marriage, she will choose to leave like my mother. If I have a child, won’t the child be as unhappy as me?
Thinking about these issues, I don’t dare to fall in love. My marriage was actually a psychological fear. Along with my colleagues around me, many were married, but they were not happy and they got divorced. Seeing them unhappy made me more convinced not to fall in love.
But looking at my father, I don’t want him to become isolated and helpless in his later years. Other fathers had grandchildren and he was left alone. How should a 30-year-old boy who has never been in love find a girlfriend?
Answer:
Passed description , I sympathize with your experience. Maybe you've been living in the shadows for years. Seeing your mother and father divorce must have hurt you tremendously.
So, there is always a voice in your heart: If you don't do well, the woman will leave and the children will suffer. Maybe you have been working hard, but you are still not confident, even though you don't say why you are not doing well.
In fact, according to your introverted personality, you should have a certain financial strength during these years of work, but you are not very confident, so you decide that you are not doing well.
And the relationship between two people often changesThe financial foundation is one thing, but the most important thing is whether the relationship is good or not. You always dare not try, and you always have a sense of inferiority in your heart. This is the reason why you are nearly 30 years old and have not been in love yet.
Now you are all thinking about giving your father an explanation. In fact, you don't approve of marriage in your heart. Maybe you still hate marriage. You think marriage is a way to honor your father. So, now you are feeling troubled and don’t know what to do.
However, in your heart, you still want to get out of singlehood as soon as possible and have your own happy family.
In this regard, I suggest you try to contact the opposite sex first. To understand your own affairs, you still have to rely on yourself. To get rid of the name, you must gain some confidence in yourself. The root cause of your singleness is actually lack of confidence. So, no matter what, you must try to reach out to the opposite sex. Only by taking this step can you possibly find a girlfriend.
Although you are very introverted, you can tell that you are a down-to-earth person. It’s just that you limit yourself so much that you can never get rid of the shadow of childhood.
In fact, your mother’s choice to leave may not be entirely due to your father not getting along well. Maybe the relationship between them is over. As for emotions, you can't tell who is right or wrong.
Having said so much, I hope you can understand. In fact, the problem you are facing now is that you have not yet emerged from the shadow of childhood. You have to understand that your mother is just an example. You don’t quite know the specific circumstances of their original separation. You just need to remember one thing, sincerity can be exchanged for sincerity. If you pursue hard and pay your sincerity, the goddess of your life will come to you.
