Nowadays, the three words "you have changed" have basically become synonymous with men becoming bad. If a couple has been together for a long time, this word will inevitably come out of the girlfriend's mouth. So in life, women My friends always say "you have changed", what should I do?
I once received this from a female reader Question:
My boyfriend doesn’t love me as much as before. Should I break up with him?
Why do you say that, I asked her.
She listed a lot of evidence about her boyfriend’s change:
In the past, my boyfriend would wait for me to fall asleep before falling asleep, but now he may have fallen asleep before I finished speaking. . My boyfriend used to play with me almost all the time after get off work, but now he just does his own business...
Me: What is he busy with, playing games?
Her : That's not the case, he's busy with work.
Me: What about his free time?
She: You will accompany me in your free time, but I rarely have free time.
Me: Why did you choose him in the first place.
She: He is handsome.
Me: Just for fun?
Her: Emmm...
Me: Just for fun.
She: I want to marry him now, so I want him to love me more, spend more time with me, and be able to take on the basics of our lives in the future.
Me: Look, not only has he changed, you have also changed.
Me: Your request has changed from "being handsome" to "love me more, accompany me more, and be capable". This is because you want to have a future with him. And it is precisely because he wants to have a future with you that he works hard to provide you with protection and peace of mind. However, in this process, he must make some choices. Rather than saying that he doesn’t love you anymore, it’s better to say that he wants to be more responsible for you, otherwise he won’t include you in his future plans.
Many people would say that men are different before and after marriage.
This sentence, along with "You have changed", has become a golden sentence for complaining about men turning bad when they get their hands on them.
In fact, if you compare love to running, pursuing this journey is like a 100-meter sprint, and the road after success is a marathon. Love has not become shallow, but one has to do his best, and the other has to Save your strength, the end is all yours.
Women will also show different appearances. As time goes by, their need to be "loved" from each other becomes more and more important, and they pay more and more.
So, if we have to say that it has changed, both parties have changed. This is a process that every relationship will go through. But it’s not that the initially ardent love has cooled down, it’s that this love now has responsibilities attached to it.
In fact, many times feelings need to find a balance between hotness and cooling. A balance that allows each other to always be in the same rhythm and feel at ease.
That is the rhythm that belongs to each other and is the glue of each other's intimate relationship.
For example, when we take a walk together after a meal, we start to adjust the size and speed of our steps, then we adjust to chatting and liking each other during the walk, and then we make the walk itself an indispensable part of each other's lives.
For example, intimacy, the running-in from... to... to... This balance, this rhythm, this running-in, which makes each other feel at ease, is the foundation of love.
Unfortunately, not everyone is willing to settle down and seek this balance. The pace is either fast or slow, and the results can be imagined.
Just like pursuing this matter, most people fail because they fail to find a balance point between each other, or they are anxious or procrastinating, so that the other party doubts whether they can trust each other with peace of mind.
The feeling that this balance conveys to people is usually the "feeling right" when choosing a mate. What is "feeling right"?
It is undeniable that it has something to do with appearance, appearance, and appearance. Strength is somewhat related, but the most important thing is the inner feeling and the resonance of the soul. This also explains why many people who are not as good as you have a significant other that you envy.
Find this balance point, let both parties be at the same rhythm, and match each other's souls. This is what feels right." Therefore, finding a balance with each other is the best way to deal with the phrase "you have changed" from your girlfriend.
