The bottom determines the head. This is the habitual thinking of many people in marriage. From their own perspective, they attribute all problems in marriage to the other party. This way of thinking is wrong.
If you want to save your marriage, you must not only learn what a successful marriage is like, but also think about what a failed marriage is like (how to avoid it). If you want to spend a happy marriage with your partner, , it must be different from before!
So, after we change our attitude from negative to positive, what techniques should we use to save marriage?
1. First, establish a reasonable cognitive model and use rational thinking to find the root cause of the problem.
Since the marriage has reached the stage of divorce, it means that the other party has negative emotions towards any of your behaviors, so we can appropriately disconnect for a period of time, adjust the correct mentality, and abandon the past. Wrong cognitive model. After all, if the cognition is negative, it is easy to complain in life, and the problem cannot be correctly identified. Only by finding the real reason for the breakdown of the marriage can we prescribe the right medicine and find a solution.
2. Secondly, reduce your dependence on your partner and make yourself as independent as possible.
Many people just rely too much on the other person. When they see that the other person is determined to leave, they will subconsciously try to save the other person. No matter who is right or wrong in this matter, they will all blame them. On our own, we seem too humble, so we must reduce our dependence on others at this time. When encountering difficulties and setbacks, the first time is not to complain, but to actively seek solutions. At the same time, we can integrate and draw on the strength of other people to Solve the problems you are facing in your marriage.
3. Finally, through continuous learning, improve your own problem-solving skills and methods.
The essence of recovery is secondary attraction. After all, you already know the other party well. If we want to attract the other party again, we can only improve our internal and external value through continuous learning and change, so that the other party can After discovering new points of interest in you and seeing changes in you, I will let go of my guard and be with you again without any scruples.
